Family

What does “family” mean to you?

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My family has been my support throughout my entire life. From teaching me how to walk and read, to watching me walk across the stage and receive my Doctor of Pharmacy diploma, they’ve always been there. When something was wrong, they answered my calls. When I was nervous, they calmed me. When I accomplished something worth bragging about, they did the bragging. Let’s face it:  My family rocks.

My parents have taught me that hard work pays off, true love conquers all, and that it’s never too late to pursue your dreams. (Shout-out to my mom, who is currently attending college at the age of 56 to fulfill a lifelong dream she’s had – to graduate college. And she’s doing that while continuing to raise a family and work full time. Mom, you’re a rockstar and I love you!) My brother has shown me that having a positive outlook on life can help you overcome even the worst of circumstances. (Shout-out to him for celebrating six years as a clean recovering addict. I’m so proud to call you my best friend.) And lastly, my sister has taught me that even when you can’t communicate with words, magical things can happen. (She’s been riding horses since she was a little girl, and when I see the way that she and the horse become one when she’s riding, it’s absolutely breathtaking.)

Some of you may already know this story, but I’ll tell (a brief version of) it anyway. When my mom was nineteen, she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl whom she placed for adoption. About ten years ago, that baby girl (who had grown to her 20s) found my mom (and our family) after much searching. To have this addition to my family was (and is) truly a blessing. She now lives with her husband and two beautiful daughters (which makes me a proud Uncle Eric) in Northern Virginia. This unique story makes my family even more special!

My mom is one of ten children, so needless to say, I’ve got a huge family. My dad only has one sister, but his side of the family is just as special to me. In losing both of my paternal grandparents (Oma in 2010 and Opa just a few short weeks ago), I have had time to reflect on just how awesome the gift of family really is.

Having such a wonderful family has given me a clear picture of what I desire when starting a family of my own:  A supportive wife who will be by my side “in good times and in bad”, that God will bless me with children who will work hard to succeed, and of course a dog to spoil!

World Meeting of Families 2015 Philadelphia

The World Meeting of Families was created in 1994 by Pope John Paul II to explore the critical role the family plays in society and to give families opportunities to talk about the challenges and blessings that all families have. This year, the World Meeting of Families is being held in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania from September 22-27, 2015. What a truly exciting time this is for my faith, the Catholic Church, and the City of Philadelphia. With this worldwide celebration being held in the United States, there has been much prayerful reflection on the concept of family in my church. I invite you to pray the following prayer with your family:

God and Father of us all,
in Jesus, your Son and our Savior,
you have made us
your sons and daughters
in the family of the Church.

May your grace and love
help our families
in every part of the world
be united to one another
in fidelity to the Gospel.

May the example of the Holy Family,
with the aid of your Holy Spirit,
guide all families, especially those most troubled,
to be homes of communion and prayer
and to always seek your truth and live in your love.
Through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, pray for us!

Families can be so different and unique, but what unites all families is their love for one another and the memories they share together. As the old adage goes, “We may not have it all together, but together we have it all.” So, in closing, I ask all of you:  What does “family” mean to you?

My family (and Melissa!) celebrating my graduation from pharmacy school

My family (and Melissa!) celebrating my graduation from pharmacy school.

A Family Tradition.

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ICYMI: The United States Olympic Committee has slated Boston as a bid city for the 2024 Olympics.

Wow.

This is especially exciting for me, since I am fortunate to have two Olympic athletes in my family. My Uncle Mike is the head coach for the United States Men’s Rowing Team and has been in every Olympics (either as an alternate, athlete, or coach) since 1984. He won a bronze medal in Seoul, South Korea in 1988. My Uncle Paul has also competed in the Sydney (2000), Athens (2004), and Beijing (2008) Olympics.

It’s also exciting for me since I attended the 2008 Olympic games in Beijing, China. See an embarrassingly old picture here:

Me with HuanHuan, one of the mascots from the 2008 Olympics.

I remember sitting in Nana and Pop-pop’s kitchen in the summer of 1996 watching the Olympics on their small television. My Uncle Mike was in Atlanta with all those other athletes, and I wasn’t going to miss seeing this. Sure, I was only 8 years old, but those memories will never fade. I remember thinking, “One day, I have to get to see the Olympics in person.” Well, in 2008, that dream came true. I got to see a foreign country, I got to eat their food, see the sights (the Great Wall is absolutely breathtaking), and best of all:  see my family members compete.

If you haven’t attended an Olympic games, it may be a nice addition to your bucket list. You get to see (and meet) the world’s greatest athletes compete. It’s the one time every two years (including Winter Olympics) that the world can come together for friendly competition. The Olympic Spirit is so contagious. And if for nothing else, you get to experience an entirely new country, culture, food, and perhaps language!

I encourage you to join me in supporting the #Boston2024 movement. Not for Boston. Not even for Massachusetts.

Do it for America. Do it for the world!

Werner A. Barbye, 1925-2015.

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On Sunday, I had to say goodbye to Opa, my paternal grandfather. He was 89.

Opa and I after my graduation from pharmacy school

Opa and I after my graduation from pharmacy school

He was predeceased by his loving wife Elfriede:

He was admitted to the hospital on Thursday, January 8 with pneumonia in his right lung. He was largely unresponsive at the hospital, so the decision was made to bring him back to the nursing home and begin hospice care. After receiving the phone call from my mom with the details of the hospitalization, I made the decision to head home to New Jersey for the weekend to spend time with Opa and my family. In retrospect, this was probably the best decision I’ve made in recent memory. Opa passed away very peacefully with our family by his side on Sunday, January 11, 2015 at 4:00pm.

My memories of Opa are fond, and were brought back to life as we looked through hundreds (thousands?) of old family pictures this past weekend. Trips to the Aquatic Swim Club, Christmases in Oma and Opa’s basement, and walks around their neighborhood were well-chronicled, as Opa was often seen with camera in hand. We used to walk up Bullens Lane to the I-476 overpass, where Oma and Opa would let us stand up against the fence and pump our arms in hopes that a few big rigs would honk their air horns (you know what I’m talking about, right?) We would sit at the corner of MacDade Boulevard and count how many car carriers would drive by, anxiously waiting for Oma and Opa to let us have a few Gummibären. I still remember how Opa taught us the “right way” to pronounce Hechinger. Opa traveled with my family and I to Germany in 1998, where we celebrated Oma’s 70th birthday. From marching in the Steuben Parade in Philadelphia as a child, to drinking fine German Weißbier today, Opa taught me to always be proud of my German heritage.

Opa fought in the German army in World War II. He was captured as a prisoner of war by the Americans and was held at Camp Pickett in Virginia. I remember him telling me that, even as a prisoner of war, that was the best he was ever treated during the war. I’m fortunate to say I’ve heard some stories that will never be published in any history book.

In Opa’s later years, he and Oma moved into the Woodbury Mews, an assisted living facility not far from my parents’ house in New Jersey. Oma’s progressing Alzheimer’s dementia and Opa’s progressing Parkinson’s disease necessitated more advanced care than we would have been able to provide. Opa used to visit his bride every day, despite living on opposite sides of the Mews (Oma lived in a special dementia unit that provided closer supervision and care for patients with advanced memory disorders.) I vividly remember sitting by Oma’s bedside with Opa many times, but especially when Oma had been placed on hospice care. That was the only time in my entire life that I’ve seen Opa cry.

If you’ve read this far, thank you. If you’ve called or texted me or my family, thank you. If you’ve expressed your condolences via Facebook, thank you. Your support, thoughts, and prayers have helped my family through this difficult time. Opa’s memory will live on forever. Please stay tuned to Facebook for funeral service details.

As I’ve posted on Facebook, the German word for “goodbye” is “auf wiedersehen.” Literally, this can be roughly translated to “until we see (each other) again.”

Ich liebe dich, Opa. Auf wiedersehen.